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Thread: I Think I Was Sexually Assaulted!

  1. #1
    Moderator Punch The Clown's Avatar
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    I Think I Was Sexually Assaulted!

    About 40 years ago I was on an elevator around Christmas time. It was in a department store and was very crowded. I felt something rubbing my crotch but I dismissed it as we were packed in the elevator like sardines. I looked at the man right in front of me and I saw he was breathing heavily and sweating profusely. I realized at that point I was being groped! The elevator door opened and the groper disappeared into the crowd before my friend and myself could catch him and throw him a beating. I told Tim about this episode and he questioned me about the identity of the groper. With his help and guidance I realized it was chuck schumer!!!! What shoudl I do? Should I come forward? I realize that it was forty years ago but the more I think about it the more I'm certain it was chuck. I feel so dirty.
    When dealing with liberals, always attribute to malice what would ordinarily be attributed to incompetence.

    "Of course it won't be easy; nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded."-Clouseau

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    Founding Member canes7's Avatar
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    You owe it to yourself. Just do it.

    #metoo
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    Administrator timshufflin's Avatar
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    I say come forward! Everybody's doing it!

  4. #4
    War Room Ready
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    Punch, you poor man. Perhaps hypnosis would help clarify the details of the tragic incident. And with the media's help you could attain closure. (and a few mil')

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    Founding Member Prince Humperdink's Avatar
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    I'm sorry bro,this brings up horrible memories of when janet reno touched me innapropriately,but she is no longer with us.
    "The advantage of being armed, which the Americans possess over the people of almost every other nation ... forms a barrier against the enterprises of ambition, more insurmountable than any which a simple government of any form can admit of." -- James Madison (1788)

  6. #6
    Administrator timshufflin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Prince Humperdink View Post
    I'm sorry bro,this brings up horrible memories of when janet reno touched me innapropriately,but she is no longer with us.
    You mean, "it is no longer with us"?

  7. #7
    Founding Member canes7's Avatar
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    Eric Holder sexually harassed me by threading to send me to “Federal Slam you in the Ass” prison if I didn’t haul crates of AK-47’s across the southern border to the drug cartels.

    #metoo
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  8. #8
    Administrator timshufflin's Avatar
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    Hmm, it saddens me to see all the fondling, groping, tickling, assault that you folks have endured.

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    Quote Originally Posted by timshufflin View Post
    Hmm, it saddens me to see all the fondling, groping, tickling, assault that you folks have endured.
    I'm just jealous. I WISH someone would fondle, grope and tickle ME. Hell. I'd even settle for assault, that's fun too!

  10. #10
    Moderator Punch The Clown's Avatar
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    I saw this picture and I started shaking uncontrollably. That was the face. It's all getting clearer now. I need closure.

    When dealing with liberals, always attribute to malice what would ordinarily be attributed to incompetence.

    "Of course it won't be easy; nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded."-Clouseau

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