A super great day in the woods.

[LEAD POISON]

Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. One morning, the first friend says, "You know, we're starting to get on each other's nerves. Why don't we split up today. I'll hike north and spend the day looking around, you hike south and spend the day. Then tonight, we'll have dinner and share our experiences over the campfire."

The second friend agrees and hikes south.
That night over dinner, the first man tells his story. "Today I hiked into a beautiful valley. I followed a stream up into a canyon and ate lunch. Then I swam in a crystal clear mountain lake. As I sat out and dried, I watched deer come and drink from the stream. The wildflowers were filled with butterflies and hawks floated all day overhead. How was your day?"
The second friend says, "I went south and ran across a set of railroad tracks. I followed them until I came across a beautiful young woman tied to the tracks. I cut the ropes off, gently lifted her off the tracks, and we had sex in every imaginable way all afternoon. Finally, when I was so tired I could barely move, So, I came back to camp."
"Wow!!" the first guy exclaimed, "Your day was MUCH better than mine. Did you get a blow job, too?"

"Nah," says the second friend eating his meal, "I couldn't find her head."

[mxlmax]

Lead Poison....remember you started it! (great joke by the way)

First year medical school, boring lecture on smooth muscle contractions controlled by the parasympathetic nervous system.....the class is right after lunch.....the professor has a dry monotone delivery.....he is losing the class.....they are bored and many are nodding off.....he sees one girl in the second row about to fall asleep....He points to her a in a loud voice ask's her...."DO YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOUR ASS HOLE IS DOING WHEN YOU ARE HAVING AN ORGASM"????? The startled girl quickly responds, "My ass hole is more than likely playing golf with his buddies"!